Yes, that is correct, I am home. Actually got here on Saturday evening. This blog will be good for other things(like my memory.) If I keep up to date on it. I was given the okay to come home but with the following restrictions. I am not allowed to eat. I am still in pain and eating makes it worse. So the remedy is no eating or drinking(not even water but in small amounts) and to be fed intravenously. So I am hooked up to this pump thing for 16 hours a day and off 8. So much fun but I'm home.
Just some last things about being in hospital. I had a good nurse named Ben for most of the daytime hours. Thanks Ben and all the other random nurses I had. I had the same roommate for the last three days. To say he was interesting is to say the least. Anthony is 84 years old, he was in for colon cancer. Some of my highlights with Anthony. Anthony for most of his grown life was a cinematographer. Thats right he made movies with some of the big names. Names like: William Holden, Alec Guinness, Maureen O'Harra, Elizabeth Taylor, Gregory Peck and others. Bunch of movies only two that I can remember now which are "The Bridge Over the River Kwai" and "Guns of Navarone." Both of these movies are excellent made about the time I was born.
He told me a lot of stories and asked a ton of trivia questions like I have been around as long as he has. He really started to catch me off guard when he started asking me questions like "who do you think was the best looking actor in film?" I have to tell you I really had to think. I didn't believe he asked me that and I truly had never thought of that question. I said Paul Newman. He agreed he was good looking but said John Derrick was the best looking guy in movies. Didn't even know who he was. He told me that Tony Curtis had a hard time keeping the gay actors from hitting on him as he was straight. Now how does he know this? A little after this he says "Aaron can you help me over here?" So I get up and go over there and he pulls at his gown and asks if his catheter was still in. Whoa, whoa don't be flashing me old man. He also told me why he had never got married. He said "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free." DOB, dirty old bastard. He told me a lot of good things that went on in his life but he left me with a feeling like I was glad I never lived or worked in Hollywood. Like my mom once said "If you work in a barn you soon smell like manure."
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Still viewing from room 408
Yes still in here. What a mess today was. Once I describe it you will think wow that place is messed up or Aaron needs to quit complaining. The doctors decided that I should try some food today and see if it causes any pain. If it causes pain than I will end up on a pic line and fed through it for the next 4 weeks. If no pain increase go home and eat. So I have not had anything to eat since Friday except that muffin Saturday morning before we came down here.
In order for me to eat anything I have to take 4 pills called Creon 24000. Well my breakfast comes and I have no Creon so I can't eat it. They through it out after a couple of hours and give me a muffin and toast which sits for another hour before they give me some creon 6000. Yep, wrong dosage. I tell the nurse who tries to get it straightened out for lunch. Did not get the right pills for lunch or any pills. Than dinner comes and they still haven't sent the right pills. Wow. I wait another two hours and get frustrated so I call their internal line if you need help and your not happy with the response. I get this woman who starts giving me a hard time for calling the line and I should call the operator, that this line is only for those who need help or are not happy with the help they are getting. I said that is why I am calling than explain a little before she cuts me off and says I will call your nurse. So the nurse gets blamed again. Not even her fault. The unit supervisor comes in and I was short with her (I truly feel awful) when I told her what was going on. Within 10 mins I had my Creon. I still believe it was wrong dosage though. Is that messed up or what?
I still have the pain when I eat so we will see what the doctor says in the morning. I have two doctors and they are giving different views and advice. Hard to figure out that way. I just want to go home.
In order for me to eat anything I have to take 4 pills called Creon 24000. Well my breakfast comes and I have no Creon so I can't eat it. They through it out after a couple of hours and give me a muffin and toast which sits for another hour before they give me some creon 6000. Yep, wrong dosage. I tell the nurse who tries to get it straightened out for lunch. Did not get the right pills for lunch or any pills. Than dinner comes and they still haven't sent the right pills. Wow. I wait another two hours and get frustrated so I call their internal line if you need help and your not happy with the response. I get this woman who starts giving me a hard time for calling the line and I should call the operator, that this line is only for those who need help or are not happy with the help they are getting. I said that is why I am calling than explain a little before she cuts me off and says I will call your nurse. So the nurse gets blamed again. Not even her fault. The unit supervisor comes in and I was short with her (I truly feel awful) when I told her what was going on. Within 10 mins I had my Creon. I still believe it was wrong dosage though. Is that messed up or what?
I still have the pain when I eat so we will see what the doctor says in the morning. I have two doctors and they are giving different views and advice. Hard to figure out that way. I just want to go home.
Monday, January 10, 2011
View from 408
Yep, even though no one reads this I thought I would tell you that I am now viewing the walls of UPMC Shadyside. This is nothing new for me as I have spent 7 or 8 weeks here in the last two years since my diagnosis of pancreatic cancer(from now on referred to as pancan). This time I am here for pain radiating from my mid to lower back through to the right front of my abdomen. Actually, some of the weeks before have been spent here for the same thing. They have no clue why this is happening. In the past they said it was pancreatitus. Now somehow because they can not confirm pancreatitus they think it is something else. All I know is I haven't had anything to eat or drink for three days now. I don't really feel like eating but it would be nice too. They did a couple of MRI's but everything looked normal. What isn't normal is high level of pain and nausea.
Should I ramble? The nurses and aides on this floor are the best. They do a great job! I have a resident Dr. named Dr. Boone. LOL just funny. My first roommate this time was just awful. He wouldn't use his call button but would just scream for the nurse to come help him. Three times in the middle of the night he did this. Left his tv on all night, nothing wrong with that except, the volume was so loud. I had Brittany buy me noise reduction headphones. They actually do help but he left that day. I think he stole some of my pain pills that I had in my overnight kit. I think he is some kind of addict. All he was worried about was getting a Oxycontin prescription. He kept mentioning it to his doctor and nurse.
Brittany was just here visiting me after her classes today. She is an amazing young lady and a great daughter. Ann Marie left yesterday(Sunday) so she wouldn't miss any work unless absolutely necessary. So it is great to have Brittany in this city.
Should I ramble? The nurses and aides on this floor are the best. They do a great job! I have a resident Dr. named Dr. Boone. LOL just funny. My first roommate this time was just awful. He wouldn't use his call button but would just scream for the nurse to come help him. Three times in the middle of the night he did this. Left his tv on all night, nothing wrong with that except, the volume was so loud. I had Brittany buy me noise reduction headphones. They actually do help but he left that day. I think he stole some of my pain pills that I had in my overnight kit. I think he is some kind of addict. All he was worried about was getting a Oxycontin prescription. He kept mentioning it to his doctor and nurse.
Brittany was just here visiting me after her classes today. She is an amazing young lady and a great daughter. Ann Marie left yesterday(Sunday) so she wouldn't miss any work unless absolutely necessary. So it is great to have Brittany in this city.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
More Food for Thought
> “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass me by. Still, let it be as you would have it, not as I.” (Matthew 26:39)
> “Mary said: ‘I am the servant of the Lord. Let it be done to me as you say.” (Luke 1:38)
> “Do not let your hearts be troubled. Have faith in God and faith in me.” (John 14:1)
> “…We even boast of our afflictions. We know that affliction makes for endurance, and endurance for tested virtue, and tested virtue for hope. And this hope will not leave us disappointed, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” (Romans 5:3-5)
> “I consider the sufferings of the present to be as nothing compared with the glory to be revealed in us.” (Romans 8:19)
> “We know that God makes all things work together for the good of those who have been called according to his decree.” (Romans 8:28)
> “Eye has not seen, ear has not heard, nor has it so much as dawned on man what God has prepared for those who love him.” (1 Corinthians2:9)
> “Praised be God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all consolation. He comforts us in all our afflictions and thus enables us to comfort those who are in trouble, with the same consolation we have received from him. As we have shared much in the suffering of Christ, so through Christ do we share abundantly in his consolation.” (2 Corinthians 1:3-5
> “Mary said: ‘I am the servant of the Lord. Let it be done to me as you say.” (Luke 1:38)
> “Do not let your hearts be troubled. Have faith in God and faith in me.” (John 14:1)
> “…We even boast of our afflictions. We know that affliction makes for endurance, and endurance for tested virtue, and tested virtue for hope. And this hope will not leave us disappointed, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” (Romans 5:3-5)
> “I consider the sufferings of the present to be as nothing compared with the glory to be revealed in us.” (Romans 8:19)
> “We know that God makes all things work together for the good of those who have been called according to his decree.” (Romans 8:28)
> “Eye has not seen, ear has not heard, nor has it so much as dawned on man what God has prepared for those who love him.” (1 Corinthians2:9)
> “Praised be God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all consolation. He comforts us in all our afflictions and thus enables us to comfort those who are in trouble, with the same consolation we have received from him. As we have shared much in the suffering of Christ, so through Christ do we share abundantly in his consolation.” (2 Corinthians 1:3-5
Monday, December 6, 2010
FOOD FOR THOUGHT AND PRAYER
* Jesus did not come to explain away suffering or remove it. He came to fill it with his presence (Paul Claudel)
* If you must suffer, suffer at least with joy. (Thomas a Kempis, The Imitation of Christ)
*No one is so deeply touched by Christ’s passion as he who has experienced like sufferings. (Thomas a Kempis, The Imitation of Christ)
*To endure the cross is not tragedy; it is the suffering which is the fruit of an exclusive allegiance to Jesus Christ. (Dietrich Bonhoeffer)
*He who seeks not the cross of Christ seeks not the glory of Christ (St. John of the Cross)
*Suffering for God is better than working miracles (St. John of the Cross)
*How good God really is. How He parcels out trials only according to the strength He gives us. (St. Thererse of Lisieux)
*Suffering in and of itself is useless, but suffering that is shared with the passion of Christ is a wonderful gift and a sign of love. Christ’s suffering proved to be a gift, the greatest gift of love, because through his suffering our sins were atoned for.. Suffering, pain, sorrow, humiliation, feelings of loneliness, are nothing but the kiss of Jesus, a sign that you have come so close that He can kiss you. (Mother Teresa, No Greater Love)
*The Cross is not a sign of death, but of life; not of frustration, but of hope; not of defeat, but of victory. (John Paul II, Angelus message, March 14, 1999)
These quotes come from an essay on suffering and cancer by the recently deceased Bishop of Fresno the Most Reverend John T. Steinbock. You can find it here www.dioceseoffresno.org/
* Jesus did not come to explain away suffering or remove it. He came to fill it with his presence (Paul Claudel)
* If you must suffer, suffer at least with joy. (Thomas a Kempis, The Imitation of Christ)
*No one is so deeply touched by Christ’s passion as he who has experienced like sufferings. (Thomas a Kempis, The Imitation of Christ)
*To endure the cross is not tragedy; it is the suffering which is the fruit of an exclusive allegiance to Jesus Christ. (Dietrich Bonhoeffer)
*He who seeks not the cross of Christ seeks not the glory of Christ (St. John of the Cross)
*Suffering for God is better than working miracles (St. John of the Cross)
*How good God really is. How He parcels out trials only according to the strength He gives us. (St. Thererse of Lisieux)
*Suffering in and of itself is useless, but suffering that is shared with the passion of Christ is a wonderful gift and a sign of love. Christ’s suffering proved to be a gift, the greatest gift of love, because through his suffering our sins were atoned for.. Suffering, pain, sorrow, humiliation, feelings of loneliness, are nothing but the kiss of Jesus, a sign that you have come so close that He can kiss you. (Mother Teresa, No Greater Love)
*The Cross is not a sign of death, but of life; not of frustration, but of hope; not of defeat, but of victory. (John Paul II, Angelus message, March 14, 1999)
These quotes come from an essay on suffering and cancer by the recently deceased Bishop of Fresno the Most Reverend John T. Steinbock. You can find it here www.dioceseoffresno.org/
"Cancer of itself is not a gift, but the grace to accept it, embrace it, and give thanks for it, is the greater gift of God within me, so that Jesus may continue his passion in me, so that Jesus may continue to glorify His Father in me, so Jesus may testify to His great love in my life, so that we may realize that a greater life awaits us." Bishop John T. Steinbock who passed away today.
Eternal rest, grant unto him, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon him. May his soul and the souls of all the faithful departed, through the Mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen.
Eternal rest, grant unto him, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon him. May his soul and the souls of all the faithful departed, through the Mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen.
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